Rock and Roll

Using my non-patented Robby's Own Comprehension and Knowledge system and the moderately-patented Robby's Own Language Logger, I'm going to review, compare, and ultimately understand some music in the same way I reviewed the top forty. Luckily for me, this time Emely has decided to be kind and give me a top five. This should be done in a day.
Additionally: my metric of personal success is again whether or not I would spend money on the song.

The composition follows:
"Each are special and completely different, though they speak of the same thing: love." - EF

1. Glory of Love - Jimmy Durante
2. Last Request - Paulo Nutini
3. Cheek to Cheek - Fred Astaire
4. Il Mondo - Jimmy Fontana
5. Flowers in Your Hair - The Lumineers

More after the break.

As always, I will read the lyrics before I consume the song, but this time I'm going to listen to it instead of watching a video. Since the list is only five long, I should be able to control my addled brain enough to actually make it through such a project.

1. Glory of Love
Jimmy Durante. Not complex lyrics, though Durante isn't at fault for that; this is a cover. The song is about the give-and-take nature of human relationships. The words stress duality of victory and defeat being not at cross purposes, but together as a part of the overall health of a relationship. And the insistent repetition of the word "little" makes me think of a male perspective on conflict. What doesn't kill you etc. Men tend to belittle the problems they're facing in order to deal with them. The chorus is key: this is a relationship-centered worldview. If it isn't that, then at least the author finds fulfillment directly from the other. "As long as there's the two of you" is a pleasant-sounding thing. I personally think it's a lie. But enough of the words!
I've never heard Durante before that I know of. The soft snare action in this song reminds me of other songs, more ridiculous than this. And I can say with some confidence that this is the sort of song people don't listen to--they swing around the kitchen when it comes on the radio. It's the sort of song a man plays for his wife when he's trying to apologize but he doesn't want to lose face ("You've got to lose a little"). You know, it's nice. It's calm. Inoffensive. Not wonderful, though. It's not everything I want in a love song. I'm looking for something explosive? Maybe that's just my mood today.
I wouldn't buy this.

2. Last Request
Paulo Nutini. Codependence. This looks to offer something more explosive, though of course "Glory of Love" is a much healthier-sounding relationship than that in "Last Request." The titular request is for a moment of physical intimacy at the end of a relationship. After having kissed a girl after things got weird and she was looking for a way to dump me, I can tell you that this is exactly the wrong way to go about the dregs of a physical relationship. It does make for great stories? But this isn't a great story. This is pain. "Last Request" is more like begging than seduction, and the need to rationalize everything you ask for ("How can this be wrong?") leads to guilt in the long run. But my favorite love songs are often worse, so don't feel any judgement from me.
The music is more soulful and emotional than I was expecting. As if Maroon 5 had an illicit child with Bruno Mars and the kid was raised by John Legend to be a jujitsu master whose sole purpose was to destroy a clan of ninjas. Now explain to me why this image exists.. The mood of the song isn't depressive or dragging. It's like the words were written separately from the music, or the author didn't really listen to the words, or like the songwriter had something in mind and received the lyrics later. OR it could be that I'm the only person who thinks that intimacy after the emotional end of a relationship is a sham.
I wouldn't buy this.

3. Cheek to Cheek.
Fred Astaire. I've heard this song, though I think from Sinatra. The difference will, I suspect, be minimal due to the overlapping lyrics and similar bands. Sinatra sings pauses more often and sometimes goes off-music, and Astaire seems to be textbook, relying on his status as a consummate entertainer. It will be interesting to hear the difference. The words are just the same as always (this song has been covered a hundred times by a hundred people, including Ella Fitzgerald and Billie Holiday, which puts the lie to what I'm about to say). It feels like a song by men, for women. "Look, baby, you know I like spending time doing my own thing, but when I'm with you I don't even think about fishing or climbing mountains or shooting bears or whatever manly things I do. I'm in heaven when I'm with you." It's not a soothing song. It's not a seductive song. It's a song about an adult relationship that has progressed to the point at which honesty is more important than prose, but prose is still enchanting.
And really, the song is textbook Astaire. I didn't hear any deviations or changes, no pausing or stresses--just the song as it was penned. And that's not a bad thing. It's a wonderful song, and it fills me up and loosens me up and makes me feel interested and then it blows great gusts of wonder in after Astaire stops singing and the music takes off. Is it meant for dancing? Yes. Will I dance to it? Well, I am Adventist, but if Delight's within arm's reach, I'll make a go for it.
I would buy an album with this on it, but I won't go seek it out for itself.

4. Il Mondo.
Jimmy Fontana. Here, I am hard-pressed, but I'll adopt Shakespeare's mood and declare "it was Greek to me." Though, the latin origin of the phrase is really quite stupid when you consider the song is in Italian.
Aside from Fontana's singing style, which seems to be one of stress and press, which isn't my cup of tea, the song is hard to encapsulate. I listened to four versions and couldn't find a version without copious synth. I understand that was the style once in the vast course of history (and I'm sad to say it's endemic to the songs that middle-aged women sing for special music at church), but I don't have to like synthesized music. The one I found that sounded the least fake had an electric guitar solo, so perhaps I had bad luck. Despite all of these horrors, the song is beautiful. It grows to a climax and crescendos like a champ. It's actually beautiful music, and I think if Josh Groban covered it, it would find a new market among urban housewives. As for me and my part, I think it's simultaneously beautiful and annoying, so.
I wouldn't buy this.

5. Flowers in your Hair.
The Lumineers. The words, as to all small modern whiteperson songs, are gibberish that have been shredded line by line and reassembled painstakingly by an FBI investigator. (Really, Noah and the Whale? If I turn my hands to flames, oh the light will burn the same? Whether you just pass it through or if it's what you meant to do? Fantastic.) Based on my extensive knowledge of such songs, lines like "So then we grew a little and knew a lot/And now we demonstrated it to the cops" have an actual, deep, semi-religious meaning to the person who wrote them and nobody else. I mean, this is the only mention of law enforcement in this song, and that is the entire context. But I'm not judging. I mean, my favorite band has a cadre of gibberish songs. Patience is the hallmark of the old and the infirm. Live to learn.
Now, I can't say whether it's a good idea to wait six months before coming back to a subject, but I re-listened to this song this morning (10/22) and I have to say I'm not enchanted. But I could see how someone could be. After the explosion of Mumford and Sons (and the tepid Reformisté at Southern), I know the siren song of banjo lite runs deep in the American psyche. And though I know many other people who would;
I wouldn't buy this.

So there's that. I now have to go observe students in the hallway to make sure they don't kill each other or worse--spit on each other. Have a musical day.