3.24

Chocolate milk at one in the morning is like a tryst that produces an illegitimate child who you love better than the children from your wife, howling shrew. The sweetness of the chocolate, sugar, and cream have a tenseness and a depth that pull you up out of the seat of your battered old BMW and into the driveway of that child's mother. I can confirm that despite it tasting better than any other thing while you drink, it leaves your teeth tasting like regret and humiliation and holding the baby and realizing that your entire life is designed explicitly around never being discovered as this child's father, and unless something goes painfully wrong, this beautiful bastard will live without you forever.