[I had an idea for something to write--but I didn't write it down immediately. I need to make that a habit. Lately, I've been writing from the perspective of famous men (John and Adam) and I think I like it. I want to continue, but I need to find men with whom I currently resonate to make the writing more powerful. I guess?]
It can't possibly be right. But love drives a man, pushes, takes up slack in his lines and fills his sails. I shouldn't, but what I should do and what I can do do not overlap. The directives which society gives leave no room for doubt. It's wrong.
And yet--
Did not I write that each man must do what he will? Do I not believe that each man has a right to run after happiness with all the strength he has? Was it not my hand that penned so many countless drafts to perfect my statements, to make them penetrate the mind and soul, to never be forgotten?
I did.
I have said before, and I'll say again, that happiness is the goal, and life is the effort to achieve it. What then, that forces move us to stay apart? Why should I care what people think of how much I love her?
And yet, I live in the public eye. I am a teacher, a worker, a man of the people. To love her so would besmirch both I and her. To have it known would kill us both.
That I would, I can not.
Who I love, I have not.
What I will, I durst not.
For she is mine, and yet not, as she belongs to me and is not mine.
-- Thomas Jefferson
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See? Don't really associate with Tommy J. I mean, maybe a bit in the middle (I really tried to stretch it to fit me) but I think I'll keep looking. I might do Henry VIII? Because that would be fun, but I don't associate with him at all either. Oh, well. Good writing exercise, anyway.
ReplyDeleteJefferson reminds me of Solomon.
ReplyDeleteAxeplain. Janelle, askplain. Seriously.
ReplyDeleteWell, I have no axe, but . . .
ReplyDeleteSolomon's downfall was always chalked up to be loving women he ought not to have done. He, like Jefferson, was lauded as the wisest of men (was it Kennedy who had a grand party with all the smart people and said something like, "There has not been so much intelligence in this room since Jefferson dined here alone"?), and yet what he knew he should not do, he did, and what he knew he should do, he did not do (now it sounds like Paul).
But yeah . . . both their biggest mistakes appeared to have been because of women, and I imagine they both struggled with it as you depicted.
I think Jefferson had a weird life. I can see what you're saying, but he wasn't the best guy in the world. He was a theist and kind of didn't believe in God. Superlame.
ReplyDeleteYeah, neither was Solomon the best. They both had weird lives.
ReplyDeleteWhich is worse, though: A man who has little to no understanding of Who God is and has never heard His voice deliberately sinning, or a man who understands Who God is, wrote books of the Bible, and received blessings and instruction by His own voice deliberately sinning?
How can two such intelligent men be so stupid? (And yet . . . how can I (I'm not that intelligent but I have no excuse)?)
The problem with "worse" is that it assumes a non-binary system. You're either deserving of death or saved by grace. Done.
ReplyDeleteThat's a good point. I find myself trying to make God's decisions sometimes. So thanks.
ReplyDelete