His bark is worse than his bite, but he wants his bite to be bad. He tells everyone that he's dangerous and they better watch themselves. He distances himself from people just so they won't get hurt. He once told a girl he loved her and that she better run. She did. He once made a friend and then deliberately hurt him. Whenever somebody leaves, he adds a notch to his sadness and sighs.
Underneath it all, he's a big old softy.
(Maybe some day, he'll admit it to himself.)
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This is rather heartbreaking. I see much of myself in it, and much of you, and much of, well, far too many people.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I find myself diabolically wishing that someone loved me enough for me to hurt him or her. Other times, I run as far away from everyone as I can because I know I cannot be trusted with that kind of power, and I don't want anyone to give it to me.
You know what's the worst part? The fact that the girl ran when he told her to. She could have made a different choice.
ReplyDeleteBut, yeah, this is like most humans, I think. Afraid of getting hurt, hurting others, hoping not to be hurt and not to hurt, hoping for some connection that makes the hurt actually worth it.
I'm not sure the girl made the wrong choice.
ReplyDeleteI wasn't saying her decision was right or wrong. This is a picture, not the whole story. Part of me feels that obliging someone's wish to be isolated from everything is not necessarily doing that person any sort of good.
ReplyDeleteBut it's not about them, often. Sometimes it's tenuous to hold onto your own happiness and stability, so engaging with someone who is seeking to actively break you might not be a good idea.
ReplyDeleteHmm. Hadn't thought about it like that, I guess.
ReplyDeleteContinuing to be with someone who wants isolation can also often hurt that person, too. Like rubbing sandpaper on a sunburn.
ReplyDeleteSure, the burned skin needs to come off, but not like that.
Either way (going or staying or some weird combination thereof), it straight up hurts.
ReplyDeleteYes, but which hurt allows healing?
ReplyDeleteMaybe that depends on the people involved. And if one is going and one is staying, then...well, I don't know. I don't have any of the answers.
ReplyDelete